My Way
Colby Porter Jr.
January 3, 2018
I just turned 21 a couple months back so it may come as a surprise to you that my all-time favorite song is “My Way” by Frank Sinatra. It was passed down to me from my grandfather.
The opening verse of the song is:
"And now, the end is near
And so I face the final curtain
My friend, I'll say it clear
I'll state my case, of which I'm certain
I've lived a life that's full
I traveled each and every highway
And more, much more than this
I did it my way”
Long ago, before I understood the significance, my grandfather wrote that verse on the inside cover of a well-worn book about Sinatra and told me to think about what it means to me. It took me a while to decide what it meant to me but I've got a pretty good grasp on it.
On October 23rd of last year I was injured during a Thursday night game against Stanford. I was running for the endzone on the play, something I've done thousands of times in my career. I took a clean hit down low on my left knee and felt something change. I got to my feet gingerly and I could tell something wasn't right but I tried my best to hide it and ignore it.
I got back to the huddle, called the play and threw a short touchdown pass to my teammate Hunter Jarmon on a slant. I couldn't push off when I threw the pass but luckily Hunter ran a flawless route and the weak pass got there. I sat down after the play and that was the last time I played in a real game.
When I was on the sideline getting poked and prodded all I could think of was what that verse meant to me. If this was the end of my football career was I happy with how things had gone?
The answer was complicated.
I wasn't happy about never winning a championship. To answer the rest of the question I have to go back a ways.
If you've followed my career for a while you know I've been with a few different programs over the past five years or so. After my junior year at Charles Town High School I transferred to Martinsburg. Folks outside my family speculated as to why.
My mother and I did not take the decision lightly. Each year at Charles Town my grades got worse. I was starting to get in with not the best crowd. Martinsburg has a great group of educators and the change of scenery was just what I needed.
After high school I faced one of the toughest decisions of my life in trying to decide where to continue my education and football career. I did have good offers. From good schools. Quite a few actually. Everyone wanted to see me play receiver, runningback, safety. Anything but quarterback. I wasn't interested. Then came Blinn.
Blinn was an amazing opportunity and an amazing experience. Blinn allowed me to better myself as a player, a student and a person. Blinn allowed me to be seen my more coaches. The coaching staff was incredible.
Coach Andersen and the rest of the staff at Oregon State made me so comfortable. I was apprehensive about being 2,778 miles away from my mom and grandfather. Coach Andersen and everyone else made Corvallis feel like home when I visited. They believed in me as a quarterback.
Circling back.
At the time of the injury I was happy I had done things my way. I was happy I had bet on myself as a quarterback and not settled for a position change. I was happy I had gone to Blinn. I was happy I was at Oregon State. I was happy to be playing for Coach Andersen. People think our relationship is strained because of some of the things that have transpired. That couldn't be further from the truth.
So, I was happy with the path I had chosen. I was happy I'd done it my way. I was very unhappy thinking it might be over, there is so much more I want to achieve as a quarterback.
When I got the details on my injury and found out I was looking at a couple months of rehab I was elated. The elation was short lived as Coach Andersen was fired shortly after. I called him as soon as I heard and we talked for a while.
Over the past two years or so Coach Andersen and I have become very close. I was very upset when I heard he'd been fired. I have a lot more to say about that but this isn't the place.
I have spent the last several weeks working my tail off rehabbing and getting back to where I was before the injury. Even better actually. I've been able to spend some time back home with my mother and grandfather. The two people I love and trust the most. I came to realize how much I missed them.
I don't have much family. Since my father died in the coal mines when I was three it's just been me, my mom and my grandfather. Over the past few months we've learned that my grandfather is sick. We don't know how much time he has left but we want to make the most of it. He would never ask but I know what I need to do. What I want to do.
I have decided to transfer.
There are a few reasons for this and I want to start by thanking everyone at Oregon State for the opportunity, the support and all the love. I can understand if those fans are upset. I know some of my former teammates are upset. I get it.
Ultimately I know this is the right choice. It’s the right choice for my family. It’s the right choice for me. It’s the right choice for the future of my football career.
Like I said, I talked extensively to the people I trust the most when making this decision.
However, in the end it was my choice.
My Way.
